Today is just one of those days where the ol' fever is acting up. I've always been a rather impatient person once I have my mind set on something as I'm totally driven by deadlines. I like to keep on somewhat of a schedule as much as I can and this whole waiting thing is killing me! Can't I just be at the finish line already?? Realistically speaking I know we aren't quite ready for another addition just yet and we have a lot of work ahead of us this year to get to that point, but both Aaron and I are extremely anxious and emotionally ready... I just wish all the other stars were aligned so that the wait would be over.
In one aspect of things, time seems to be flying by. As it draws closer, for instance, I still am in awe that my "baby" is almost a year old, walking, almost talking, and just becoming a toddler all around. I'm trying as much as I can to just sit back and enjoy my time with him and Jayden as I know that they will only be this young once. I also know that we need as much time as possible to get ourselves in a better financial position: we need to have Aaron working and pay off as much debt as we can. But days like today creep in every now and then where the desire seems so great and I take on the "not fair!" attitude. Sure, I'm more than grateful for my family and the things I do have...we are so truly and ultimately blessed. On the other hand, I don't think I'll be completely at ease until I know my family is complete. I know that Aaron and I want more kids and that there are members of our family waiting in the wings, and THAT is what I am impatient for. I'm ready to welcome them to our family in this world and then continue on this journey together as a whole and complete family.
I know it will be here before I know it once I've looked back on it, but right now December cannot be here soon enough!! Aaron and I are ready for Santa to bring us a different kind of present...one 9 months in the making! :)
...ugh. Waiting sucks.
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