Kind Thoughts

I just thought I would stop in really quickly and ask for prayers and/or good thoughts concerning two things that have recently developed in the family...

First is for my mom and her dog. My mom is on her way back from a Vegas vacation with my aunt for my aunt's birthday and she left her dogs in the care of my older sister while she was away. My mom's Rottweiler, Riko, who is 7 years old has been limping for about 6 weeks. At first my mom thought nothing of it because he plays rough with her other dog and figured it had something to do with that, but recently it got worse and so my sister took him to the vet while my mom was in Vegas only to find out that he most likely has bone cancer. My sister really debated whether or not to tell my mom while she was on vacation because she didn't want to ruin their fun... Well, my mom called me yesterday from Vegas and asked me if I'd heard "the news" which solidified the fact that my sister did spill the beans (which I'm glad she did since days are precious in his case). They needed to do further testing on him in order to figure out what it was and I'm pretty sure they needed my mom's consent. So, anyway, my mom told me that my sister took Riko back in after his initial visit for a follow-up and they have confirmed the worst: it IS cancer.

They did a biopsy yesterday to find out what kind of cancer it is. There's a really bad one called osteosomething ( I cannot remember the full name) that they are hoping it turns out not to be, but they won't know the kind or severity until the results are back on Monday. The good thing is that they did a scan of his lungs and it has not spread there yet, which they say it's typically the first place it does spread to. In the end, it doesn't really matter since at this point there's not much they can do and the options they do have are only to delay the inevitable. My mom's dog is going to die. They are giving him anywhere from 3-9 months depending on the severity of the cancer and any treatments they can do. My mom has said that they've given her two or three options: they can try doggie chemo (which my mom doesn't have the $$ for), they can give him painkillers to just keep him comfortable, or they can amputate his leg. Right now, my mom is leaning towards the latter even though her regular vet has said it's not the wisest idea because of the fact that he is such a big, heavy dog and really needs as many legs as possible to offset his weight...otherwise it could cause support problems for the legs he has left and when his remaining limbs become brittle as well, amputation won't really be an option anymore. However, the bone in his leg is so brittle at this point that it's at a huge risk of breaking so amputating the one leg might help. She doesn't like the idea of amputation as much as anyone else, but as she told me in a tearful voice yesterday, " [she'd] rather have him lose his leg if it will help to keep him around longer".


As I've said before, my mom doesn't deal well with the reality of death. I don't think it would be nearly as hard on her as it is if it wasn't for the fact that she's lost both of her parents and her younger brother all in 6 years. Her youngest brother, Mike, also has cancer and has opted not to do any treatments on it either so she knows he will meet the same fate too...just not when. My grandma died in June 2008 and they were very close so that loss is still much too fresh for her. In addition, my mom is one of those people who cannot be alone. She can't stand it. She has the burning desire for a long, lasting, romantic companionship and she's struggled ever since her last divorce 3 years ago to find her "soulmate". I fear that she's feeling lonely and depressed from the lack of a male companion in her life and she thinks that she's going to end up alone at home as the "dog lady" because she may never find that one special person for her because she's "too old" and no one wants her. Honestly, my mother (despite her quirks that can sometimes drive you batty) is one of the most loving, sweetest, generous, and just plain wonderful people I know. Plus, for a woman of her age (and she's not OLD...surely not by my standards anyway) she's absolutely beautiful. People think she's one of my sisters when we are in public! I'm very blessed to call her one of my best friends. So, my heart just breaks for her to hear this news. Her dogs mean so much to her...they are like her kids too and I'm afraid that facing this newest impending loss will just crush her.


I pray for wisdom for the vets to help guide her and make the soundest decisions concerning Riko's care. Hopefully this will give my mom a little more clarity, understanding, and assurance as she can get in a time like this. I also pray for as much peace and strength during this time as God sees fit to provide her with. I wouldn't go as far as to say that my mom is a non-believer but she has not committed herself to Christ, and I think it's wonderful that she has asked for prayer. I'd like to help her any way that I can. I don't believe that even if I asked for a miracle it could happen because at this point there's not much of a chance of complete healing but I would like to ask that, if you feel comfortable, please keep my mom, Debbi, and her Riko in your thoughts and prayers. Please pray to help this transition in her life be as seamless as can be achieved. I've added a picture below for you all of my mom and Riko at Christmas so that you know who you are praying for and thinking of. Thank you.



Lastly, in lighter news, Aaron's contract job is up this month (well, January actually but seeing as December is hours away from being over...you get it) and the contract company he works for is supposed to be looking for new positions to place him in once his contract is up. We have not yet heard back from them regarding any new positions lined up for February, but Aaron has been in contact with a different company who wants to submit his resume for a 9-month contract which starts right at the end of his current contract. The position is a Project Manager position for Microsoft and it pays $30 an hour which is a HUGE increase from what he's making now. He's making good money where he is at SCCA but this is a major, major increase for him. In addition, it would look wonderful for him to have Microsoft on his resume and would open many doors for his future employment options and also would help us reach our family goal of paying off our debts that much faster. The representative for the placement company thinks that Aaron would be a great fit for the position, said his resume looks fantastic, and seems rather confident that his chances are good since they typically like to start with the smaller contracting companies first (lowest bidder type of thing, I guess). The position opens for resume submittal on January 8th so Aaron will be placed in the pool for selection. I'm not sure how long it will be until they select someone but I imagine we would know something within the next 3 weeks or so.

Please feel free to pray for us, and most importantly for Aaron, that he would be selected for this job. It would be so wonderful for him if he did. He's been striving to get good experience on his resume so that he can find better-suited jobs for his abilities and this would definitely open up some avenues. Looking at the bigger picture, though, please pray that even if the Microsoft position doesn't pan out that he will soon have something else lined up. If he doesn't have any job in the works by the end of this month, he'll have to get back on unemployment which would slow things down financially for us until he receives a new contract (or permanent position). Fingers crossed that we are able to find a job for him soon and have a longer period of financial stability. We are most grateful that he's able to have any work even if it is in the form of a contract position, but we'd ideally love to have a permanent placement for him so he doesn't have to stress out and we don't have to worry as much about finances and job security.

I hope you all have had a wonderful year, keep looking towards the future, and thank you very much for your kind thoughts and prayers for our family. There are wonderful things on the horizon for 2010 and I cannot wait to see what is in store.

Happy (almost!) New Year!

Christmas & A Final Goodbye to 2009

Ok, so the 2009 Andresen/Farley/Hartman/Bresnahan (yes, we have LOTS of family!!) Christmas festivities are finally at a close and I can share some pictures with you!! It took us 3 DAYS to make the rounds to all the family for the holidays (hopefully in a few years we will have a house and everyone can come to US! Ha, a girl can dream...). It was crazy & hectic, but still fun despite all the upheaval that has happened in the family lately (see my last post). It started with Christmas Eve which caught us tying up loose ends as I was still doing some last minute shopping and wrapping. Aaron's mom came over and cooked us a lovely Christmas Eve dinner of pork chops and mashed potatoes (and they were seriously the most delicious pork chops I've ever had!). We opened a couple of gifts that night from Nana Joan and Aunt Judi & Uncle Larry. Jayden was in love with the Christmas Thomas & Friends wrapping paper that Aaron's mom used to wrap the gifts with. He was in HEAVEN! Especially since he got an easel from Nana Joan to color on (and later he got an art kit from my dad too...he's all set to be the next Picasso!). Then Aaron read the Christmas Story from the Bible (in the Book of Luke, I believe) and we put the kids to bed and played Santa for the following morning. Nana Joan went home to frost some pastries she was making for my dad and then she came back on Christmas day.

When we woke up Christmas day the kids were so interested in and excited about their presents and it was so fun to see them unwrap them. Jayden's first Christmas wasn't all that exciting as he was only 2 weeks old and slept through it, and even his second Christmas last year he wasn't really big on the whole unwrapping thing. This year was better and he'd had lots of practice this month with his birthday party two weeks prior. I had expected the same behavior from Jaxson as I'd seen from Jayden's prior Christmases since he is only 8.5 months old, but it just goes to show you just how different two kids can be. Jaxson was all up in his presents... and even his big brother's (which caused a little rivalry as Jayden is definitely in the "no sharing" stage although he expects Jaxson to share his toys with him, ha!). So we actually ended up with both boys unwrapping and playing with their presents or at least most of them. Towards the end it got a bit boring for them and Jayden was way too busy playing with his Madagascar stuffed animals (he had to carry ALL five of those to every place we went!) so Mommy and Daddy had to help them, but I got lots of pictures of them diving right in, so that's fine by me. :)

Mommy and Daddy also got a special Christmas gift from Jayden: a plaque of his handprint that he hand-painted himself (he LOVES art!!!) at daycare.

Afterwards we cleaned up and got ready to go to my dad's house in Sammamish. Nana Joan was going to go with us, but she wasn't feeling well so she stayed home and relaxed instead. It was really nice going to my dad's house because Jayden and Aaron love to play with my younger brothers, Riley and Ramzani, who are 10 and 11. Plus it was the first time we had all the family back here for Christmas. My recently-engaged stepsister, Chelsey, and her domestic partner, Carrie, were there as was my brother Jerod (his girlfriend Tasha stopped by briefly), and my brother Cory and his wife, Kelly, who just told me that they are moving back from California on a permanent basis. I'm excited that they are home and it was nice to see them and have them meet Jaxson for the first time and to see Jayden again (I think the last time they saw him was a year ago). My dad made a huge feast as usual with a turkey, twice baked potatoes, green beans, ciabatta, homemade macaroni & cheese, salad, and then we had two different pies, cookies, and the pastries Nana Joan made for dessert. So delicious!! By the evening the kids were restless and uninterested in opening gifts, so while Jaxson napped in Aaron's arms and Jayden was off playing with my brothers' Legos I opened gifts for us. We got some really neat stuff! I had asked for a spice rack (which I got) and then Chelsey and Carrie surprised me with this awesome cookbook from Williams Sonoma which ties in great with our family resolution to workout more and eat better. :) The kids scored with some nice toys from Grandma and Grandpa too. I didn't get any pictures at my dad's house because it was so hectic though. :(

Then, finally, on the 26th the festivities came to a close out in Gold Bar at my sister's house with her family and my mom. We had a dinner of prime rib, mashed potatoes, the most delicious rolls ever, and green bean casserole. We opened some more presents from my mom and my sister's family. Jayden got this really cool basketball hoop that hooks on to his door and he was so excited about it. Both boys got new bath toys, and we got a new highchair seat that just hooks onto one of our existing dining room chairs which is a great space saver for our tiny apartment. Aaron got a gift certificate and I got some picture frames and a gift certificate for a manicure and pedicure which I desperately need. :) Jayden and Jaxson both had a fun time playing with my sister's kids. Jayden and my niece, Caydence, are only 8.5 months apart in age so they get along really well.

Oh, and I just added this picture from a couple days after Christmas because I'm biased and I just think my son is too darned cute for his own good. He just makes his Mama melt. :)

All in all, it was a wonderful Christmas, but I'm glad that it's over and that 2009 is coming to a close. It had its ups and its downs and I'm just really ready to start over fresh in 2010. I think there are a lot of good things on the horizon for our family next year and I'm excited to see what the next year brings us. Things are starting to possibly look up for our financial situation which means we can pay off more debt and find a bigger place to live...and that right there is a huge weight lifted off of us. I'm also excited to watch our kids grow and I'm especially looking forward to Jaxson's first birthday, mine and Aaron's 25th birthdays (mid twenties...wow!), and much more. Not to mention (ahem...) that the new season of "The Bachelor" starts next week (I'm such a sucker!). Goodbye 2009... and hello 2010!! :)

Live Well

Christmas was okay this year...well, with the kids it was fantastic although they weren't as much into unwrapping the presents as I thought they would be (I promise to upload and share pictures with you shortly), but to be honest there were a lot of little (and one not-so-little) things that kind of overshadowed the holidays this year and it's safe to say that I'm glad that the holidays (and this year) are close to over. That isn't to say that 2009 wasn't without it's good points... I mean, we welcomed our 2nd son into our family and that right there is enough to make a great year, but maybe it's just me in a downer, "bah humbug" kind of mood that seems to think that Jaxson (and really having two happy healthy boys) was the only great thing that came out of this crappy year. I'm just ready to put it all behind me and welcome a new year, a new century, and pray that it will be happier and more prosperous.

Anyway, so there were a couple things I found out about that happened on my dad's side of the family that were kind of sad to hear about over the holidays. I don't want to go into specifics because I feel it would be a violation of their privacy, but suffice it to say that my heart feels heavy for them and I pray that time will heal things and they can also look at 2010 as a new beginning. In addition, I just found out that my mom's dog might have bone cancer and if he does (which it's highly likely) the outcome is very grim. If it hasn't spread (which is unlikely), then they can amputate his leg that it's in... but really there's nothing that can be done if it has...except for doggie chemo and that's spotty at that. I feel so bad for my mom because she's really been struggling with the whole reality of death. In the last 6 years she's lost her mom and dad, her younger brother, and my other uncle also has cancer now (or so we've been told) and so there's just been so much death surrounding her. I'm afraid she cannot take much more. She lives alone with her two dogs, and the deaths of her family coupled with the fact that her dog is gravely ill AND she doesn't have a stable relationship which she desires makes me feel like she's going to lose it. She is already so upset about being alone... I just don't know what to do and in fact I'm not even sure what to pray for. Strength for her for sure, but beyond that I really don't know.

Lastly, and biggest of all, we cut pretty much all ties with Aaron's brother 2 days before Christmas. Long story short, Aaron and his brother play fantasy football and they were in a league involving money and things essentially got out of hand when Aaron felt like his brother was taking advantage of the other players in the league (Aaron was already out of the championship so it didn't matter for him per se) and he called him out on it...in front of all of his co-workers and boss. While I don't agree with how Aaron went about it, and his brother has not admitted he did this, I'm disappointed that this is what it came to. Aaron and his brother are like a rollercoaster... when they get along they are great, but when crap hits the fan it's a huge blowout. This is not the first time that we haven't been on speaking terms with them...especially over stupid fantasy football. Honestly, I think it's the dumbest thing ever to fight over and I feel that whether or not Tommy was dishonest Aaron definitely needed to keep the matter private instead of involving Tommy's job, but I guess that's what happens when you put two highly competitive (and let's admit it, sometimes selfish) personalities together. Growing up with my dad, I can relate as we are both very stubborn...we were so much alike that we clashed all the time and I don't know how we survived my teenage years living under the same roof. Same deal with Aaron and his brother... it's drama after drama after drama. They've both reached a point where it's not worth it to even try anymore, which in some aspects makes me really sad because our kids will not really ever know each other and I'm not one to take kindly to alienating anyone...especially family. I've never been good at it. I've always been the peacekeeper. I tried to do damage control and at least keep a civil talking relationship with them since really this had nothing to do with me or the boys, but I felt as if I was treated in a rude manner for something I was never involved in so I've realized that I have to let go. I'm not saying that they don't have a reason to be mad, however I think it's frustrating to feel like I'm being reprimanded when I had nothing to do with the situation whatsoever. I feel like I've put up with a lot and just kept my mouth shut in order to keep the peace, but I'm tired of being so diplomatic. So, in essense, I'm starting to feel some slight relief amongst the sadness that we don't have a relationship with them anymore. Maybe it's just better this way. I wish them the best and I hope they are happy in their lives and I definitely don't hate them, but I don't feel the desire to go out of my way to salvage anything anymore. It would be a futile effort to save something that may not be mended. It's unfortunate it had to happen this way, but could also be fortunate in ways that will appear to us as we go on. Neither of our respective families need the stress from this kind of relationship. Plus, Aaron and I (and most importantly our kids) will still have good influences in our lives through my family and his mom's family and we want our boys to learn from those good influences. Families are about good morals, good attitude, and lots of love... and sometimes we feel like we didn't get much of that from the relationship with his brother. Plus with their differing attitudes and personalities (and even the traits they had in common were not always compatible in the same environment), Aaron avoided his brother a lot because he felt that a little bit went a long way and he could only take him in small doses. It's kind of like an overpowering perfume... the scent can be so strong at times that sometimes it just gives you a headache.

That being said, there may be a possibility in the future of a reconciliation, but we will take it as it comes I guess. Ideally, it would be nice if everyone could get to a place of forgiveness and we can move on with our lives whether it's together or not. There are parts of that familial relationship I will definitely miss as well as others I'd be fine to do without. Only time will truly tell what will happen and if the relationship can be mended to a point. I don't think things will ever be exactly as they were but maybe we can at least be able to show each other some civility if placed in those circumstances which would require it. If a reconciliation does come to pass, there will definitely need to be major changes and boundaries to avoid things like this in the future. Going through this once is enough. I'm all for riding rollercoasters, but this is not one I'd like to take another ride on...

At any rate I'm convinced and motivated to live my life to the fullest and just keep on going. There's that saying that "the best revenge is to live well". While I don't feel that revenge is the right word and I don't really agree with revenge at all, I do like the essense of this saying. When you fall, just dust off the dirt, put a Band-Aid on the scrapes, and get back up. And do it better than ever. So that's what we are going to do. We are going to get back up and keep living.

... And we are going to live well.

Here's to a happy and prosperous 2010! A new year, a new century.... a new beginning.

Happy Holidays!

Ok, it's finally my last post and I'm all caught up on pictures! Phew!! I feel like I've been running a marathon to keep up with all of the pictures I've had over the months. So, we had a busy and productive weekend last weekend with last-minute preparations for Christmas (which I cannot believe is 4 days away!). On Saturday we went to JC Penney's for family holiday pictures as well as Jayden's 2 year photo shoot and an early 9 month photo shoot for Jaxson (he's just shy of 9 months old...wow!!). It was all dandy during the family pictures, but before long Jayden was bored and uncooperative... all he wanted to do was play with the plastic candy canes and curl up on the floor with his blanky and sleep. He did end up giving some good ones of him laying with his blanky although it wasn't what I had envisioned for his pictures. Jaxson was a little better, but he's busy and he's a very fast crawler so we couldn't keep him in one place long enough to get a lot of good shots. We did get a couple though. I also made our Christmas card with the pictures we got. :)

Then on Sunday we did our Christmas shopping and decided to go and get Santa pictures. I didn't realize that Santa closes early (6:00pm) on Sundays and we got there at 5:00. When we got there at 5, the lady told us it was about an hour wait and that even if we were the next in line at 6:00 that there was no guarantee that we would get in to see Santa. How big of a bummer would it have been to get the kids all dressed and excited to see Santa, to be the next in line only to be told to come back another day...after waiting for an hour? We decided to brave it anyway since we had the kids dressed and were already there. Last year they told us it would be a 2 hour wait and we got to see Santa in less time so I was hoping we'd have the same luck. The wait was literally so intense and the whole time we were thinking we weren't going to make it. 3 minutes left and we were the 3rd family in line to see Santa. People rushed through to get their pictures and we got to the front of the line... and then the lady told us: "You will be the last ones to see Santa". PHEW! We got so lucky, but I felt so bad for the families with their kids behind us who were told they "might" get to see Santa only to go home without a visit (Aaron convinced Santa to take pictures with the family behind us, which he did). By this point, Jayden was cranky and only wanted Daddy and to run around like a crazy toddler (note to self: don't ever give your child a handful of gummy bears while waiting for Santa again. It makes for an even crazier and uncooperative child...). I quickly plopped Jayden down into Santa's lap while Aaron handed Jaxson to him. Jax did GREAT! He was very curious as to who this Santa person was. And as for Jayden...well, the picture speaks for itself. Oh well, we thought it was funny and will serve as good embarrassment for future girlfriends. Haha!

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and only the best for a New Year! 2009 has been a interesting but exciting and chaotic year for us. We are looking forward to ringing in 2010 and hoping that it has more wonderful things in store for us as we hope it will for you. Season's Greetings from our family to yours for a wonderful holiday season. God Bless!